(no subject)

[fearmylaserface]

...

Okay.  I have a few major questions.  Really.  As much as I might like having the human body?  Where did it come from?  And how the hell did I get here?

Also, who's idea was it to put me in bed with some random woman?  I don't appreciate it.  Really.  Fucking jackasses.  I just got closure there.  I don't need another one to complicate things.

And really, what is with the lack of real technology here?

Comments

[i_got_this]

[South, meanwhile, is yanking on some pants after that rude awakening, glaring at the idiot she'd rudely awoken next to.]

It wasn't any picnic for me either, asswipe.

[fearmylaserface]

Get off my back, woman.

For fuck's sake, it's like dealing with Tex all over again. [Facepalming]

Who the hell are you?

[i_got_this]

[Freezing and glaring as soon as she hears that name, then grabbing a shirt and stalking closer.]

How the hell do you know her?

[Yeah, ignoring your question for now.]

[fearmylaserface]

...

Who? Tex? She's my girlfriend.

[i_got_this]

[South just stares at him for a moment, caught somewhere between 'what does Tex even see in this asshole' and 'my ass is dead.']

[She scoffs. This guy can't be real.] You're dating Agent Texas. [She does not sound convinced.]

[fearmylaserface]

Of course.

I'm awesome. Name is Church. May I ask who the raging bitch I'm dealing with is?

[i_got_this]

[She straightens, crossing her arms over her bra, her shirt still dangling from her shirt. This guy was rich.]

You're not the Director. If you were, you'd already know who I was.

[fearmylaserface]

Wait...

I think I remember you. Though I'm pretty sure I'm more familiar with you clothed. Definitely a bitch.

[i_got_this]

[She lets out a sound of aggravation and drags the shirt over her head.]

So if you remember me then you won't need me to introduce myself.

You aren't Church, though. I'm not that stupid.

[fearmylaserface]

Of course I'm Church. Leonard Church.

And seeing as you're an Agent... With that bitchy attitude? Agent South Dakota. You have a lot in common with Tex...

[i_got_this]

[Crossing her arms and popping her hip up, clothed and peeved and scowling at him. So he did know who she was.]

[She's still not buying it that he's the Director, though.]

Yeah? Well you have nothing in common with the Director. So congrats on getting my name right, you might want to try again with yours.

[She stalks past, shoving him with her shoulder on her way to the kitchen.]

[fearmylaserface]

My name is Leonard Church, bitch. Get over yourself.

[i_got_this]

Get over myself? [Spinning around in the hall and glaring back at him.]

Get over yourself. You're the one claiming to be someone you're not.

[fearmylaserface]

Nope. I'm definitely Leonard Church. And I'm pretty sure you aren't authorized to know anything else.

[i_got_this]

Right, authorized, as if I gave a shit about your fake personal files.

[Who cares if it's eight in the morning, she's going for a beer.]

[fearmylaserface]

Really, I'm starting to wonder about the Director's choice in agents... You really aren't observant. Just really bitchy.

I never said I was the Director.

[i_got_this]

[South yanks the fridge open, grabs a cold one, and then kicks the door closed. Then unsuccessfully tries to unscrew the non-screw top and swears as she cuts her hand. WHUT. This is bullshit.]

How can you be one and not the other? The Director IS Leonard Church, you asswipe.

[She slams the unopened beer on the counter, shoves the faucet on, and sticks her hand under it, then starts looking for a dishtowel to press against the cut.]

[fearmylaserface]

He isn't the only one that identifies as that involved in the project. Not with the AIs.

[Smirking as he follows her out.] You missed the lower tech here, bitch. You need a bottle opener.

[Digging around for a bottle opener.]

[i_got_this]

AIs? What do you mean, AIs? [This shithead wasn't making any sense.]

[She leans against the counter as she runs the water over her hand, before finding a clean dishcloth and pressing it against the wound, rolling her eyes.] Thanks for that, I hadn't fucking noticed.

[fearmylaserface]

My name is Leonard Church. I'm an AI fragment made for Project Freelancer.

[He opens the beer once he finds one and offers it to her.]

[i_got_this]

[Her injury under control (fairly unsubstantial and superficial, wrapped tightly with the dishtowel), She turns and leans back against the sink, looking from the opened beer to Church before grabbing it with her good hand and taking a swig.]

An AI fragment with the name Leonard Church. First of all, why take someone else's name? Secondly, how the hell do you even fragment an AI?

[Another drink, and then she's adding, jabbing a finger at his arm --] You're not even an AI.

You are so full of shit.

[fearmylaserface]

It's my name as much as the one that dick gave me is. I'm a fragment of an AI named Alpha. He was based on the Director.

And I know I'm not now. Why do you think I asked about the human body?

[i_got_this]

[She snorts into her beer, did she hear that right?] Did you just call the Director a dick? Damn, I'm glad I'm not you.

I thought maybe you might be on acid or something. [She pushes off the sink and wanders around the kitchen, opening cupboards, looking into drawers. Who's lousy shitbox of a house was this and why were they in it?] So you're a fragment from an AI based on my Boss. [Not entirely convinced yet.]

[fearmylaserface]

Hey, it's not wrong. And that asshole is not here. Why should I worry?

No, definitely no drugs here.

And you're a bitchy Agent that has all the subtlety of a sledgehammer to the face.

[i_got_this]

[She narrows her eyes at him again as she takes another drink.] You're certain of this?

Where is this, anyway? [Walking to the back door and pulling the curtain aside to look out at the back yard. At that other comment she's turning to glare at him.] Go cry me a fucking river.